We’d been “not NOT trying” for just over a year. Meaning I was struggling to navigate my body’s cycles after a decade of birth control. I was just starting to settle into the fact that it could be a while before we actually conceived. Then BOOM.
Hubs has been heartbreakingly cute. Making efforts to be sure I’m eating well, and feeling ok. I’ve noticed a new twinkle (excitement?) in his eyes. A small part of me was a little worried he wasn’t quite ready. I’ve been reading and preparing for this for a while, but I think I’m actually more freaked out than he is. But I guess his body isn’t creating another person, so maybe that accounts for the difference.
I got to tell my family over Christmas, and a couple friends who would wonder why I wasn’t drinking over New Years. Hubs’ family was out of the country until a few days ago, so we’ll tell them when we celebrate our belated Christmas this weekend.
I’ve alternated between ecstatic, terrified, elated and sobbing in the last few weeks. Not having complete control over my emotions is going to take some getting used to. So is not having control over much of anything anymore.